January Charts: 1981

Here are the new entries ranked from best to worst:

1. Ultravox - Vienna

2. Dire Straits - Romeo And Juliet

3. Blondie - Rapture

4. The Teardrop Explodes - Reward

5. Phil Collins - In The Air Tonight

6. Slade - We'll Bring The House Down

7. Susan Fassbender - Twilight Café

8. Madness - The Return Of The Los Palmas Seven

9. John Lennon - Woman

10. Spandau Ballet - The Freeze

11. James Brown - Rapp Payback (Where Iz Moses?)

12. Heatwave - Gangsters Of The Groove

13. Diana Ross - It's My Turn

14. Rainbow - I Surrender

15. XTC - Sgt Rock (Is Going To Help Me)

16. Light Of The World - I Shot The Sheriff

17. Passions - I'm In Love With A German Film Star

18. The Boomtown Rats - The Elephant's Graveyard (Guilty)

19. Odyssey - Hang Together

20. Coast To Coast - (Do) The Hucklebuck

21. Adam & The Ants - Cartrouble

22. Barbara Jones - Just When I Needed You Most

23. Sheila Hylton - The Bed's Too Big Without You

24. David Bowie - Scary Monsters (And Super Creeps)

25. Cliff Richard - A Little In Love

26. Fred Wedlock - The Oldest Swinger In Town

27. Honey Bane - Turn Me On, Turn Me Off

There's the theory that once a decade ends there's a clear-out of the big name popular musicians to make way for a new breed. This batch of records suggests otherwise. Whilst it's barely over a year into the new decade the majority of artists had some sort of chart presence in the 70s and many of those who didn't were one hit wonders.

Take the number one record for example. "Vienna" is most famous for not being a number one and is an excellent record. Ultravox may not have had a Top 40 hit until 1980 but singer Midge Ure first hit the Top 40 as part of Slik in 1976.

In 2nd place we have Dire Straits who first hit the Top 40 in 1978 as did Blondie in 3rd place. Crucially though all 3 of these records were driving music forward and didn't sound like they came out of the 70s.

We do have an authentic 80s band in 4th place with Teardrop Explodes debuting with their biggest hit "Reward". Phil Collins may have been the Genesis drummer and subsequently singer in the 70s but his solo debut "In The Air Tonight" was as 80s as they come.

Even Slade were a pleasant surprise. They had extensive success in the 70s before fading into obscurity in the latter part of the decade but their comeback record "We'll Bring The House Down" was very much adapting to the hard rock sound of the moment.

Next up we have one hit wonder Susan Fassbender with "Twilight Cafe". It's one of those records which has an identity of it's own and now frozen in time to be fondly remembered.

Not all one hit wonders this month were good. Down the bottom we have "Turn Me On, Turn Me Off" which you can tell will be irritating from it's title alone and that's exactly what it is. Likewise "The Oldest Swinger In Town" by Fred Wedlock is as silly as it sounds.

Obviously Cliff Richard isn't a one hit wonder and his effort here went in one ear out the other. I've already said I'm not a fan of David Bowie and "Scary Monsters (And Super Creeps)" does little to convince me otherwise.

More one hit wonders above with Sheila Hylton and Barbara Jones both doing covers of 70s hits reggae style which again doesn't cover 1981 one hit wonders in glory. Just above that we have an authentic 80s act Top 40 wise with Adam & the Ants but the record comes from their 1979 album. 

After a strong 1980 it seemed almost inevitable that 1981 wouldn't be as good, but still a decent enough score.

Score: 43

UK Number 40s: Megan Thee Stallion & Nicki Minaj - Hot Girl Summer (2019)

 

Here we have 2 artists that I've both heard of and a record I was at least aware existed before getting to it on the list, yet it only made number 40. I had to double check that it did really only made number 40 to be sure.

This was the Top 40 debut for rapper Megan Thee Stallion. As you may expect, she did go on to have greater chart success. Her follow up "Savage" made number 3 and her third single "WAP" topped the charts. It was back to the lower reaches after that, like with all these modern artists there's the possibility of greater chart success to come but at the time of writing she's averaged around 1 Top 40 hit a year since this debut.

Nicki Minaj on the other hand is an artists who has had more Top 40 hits than many people would think. This was hit number 36 and at the time of writing she's had at least one Top 40 hit every year since she made her debut in 2010. Only Calvin Harris and Drake have managed the same streak.

UK Number 40s: Dave - Black (2019)

 

When I first came up with the idea to make this series of posts, this record was the latest one to peak at number 40 and it's got no further since. 6 years later we've inevitably had more records peaking at 40.

In the beginning I could talk about the beginning, middle and end of ones Top 40 career and in some cases the beginning, middle and end was the same thing. As we've got more current we're seeing artists who could still have a long Top 40 career ahead of them.

In the case of this artist, I would guess he still has more Top 40 hits to come. This record came barely a year after he made his Top 40 debut but this was already hit number 7 for him. He'd already had a number one and has topped the charts since. In 2019 alone he clocked up 11 Top 40 hits and has continued to clock up hits since. With that sort of quantity some will get to the lower reaches and this was one of those.

Top 30 in 1999 Reviewed: Week 42

Here's my weekly look at the Top 30 from 26 years ago. The plan is for these posts to go out at 17:30 on a Sunday.

Here is the Top 40 in full.

I've decided against repetition from previous weeks moving forward so will only feature the records I'm reviewing for the first time. I also won't repeat the reviews from the Top 20 in 1999 Reviewed posts.

Once again my opinions are inevitably going to differ from other people, but I'm not trying to convince anyone something is good or rubbish, I'm simply giving my opinion.

So this is the records new to the top 30 from this week in 1999 with my verdict on each record:

28. Martay ft ZZ Top - Gimme All Your Lovin' 2000

The year 2000 wasn't here yet, but there was a lot of hype about it arriving with the 2000 on the end of this record being an example. It was a dance record with a female rapper on the verses and ZZ Top doing the chorus. It's as bad as it sounds.

Verdict - Rubbish

25. Lucid - Stay With Me Till Dawn

I was a big fan of the Lucid debut "I Can't Help Myself" and quite liked their follow up "Crazy" too. For their 3rd and final Top 40 hit to date they turned down the tempo and covered "Stay With Me Till Dawn" by Judie Tzuke. I love the original of this but this cover doesn't really do it any justice.

Verdict - Rubbish

If we give the records which were good 1 point each and those which were OK half a point, the final score is 10/30, or 33%. We stay the same.

Dutch Top 40 1995: Week 42

These were the new entries in the Dutch Top 40 that never made the UK Top 40:

Andre Rieu - Strauss Party

This was the end of the road for Andre Rieu in the Dutch Top 40. It's a record that many people would be familiar with, I'm pretty sure this has appeared on adverts before. 

Bonnie Tyler - Making Love (Out Of Nothing At All)

This is a record I'm surprised didn't make the UK Top 40 but at the same time I'm not. I remember this record very well at the time and it was played a lot on Radio 1. This was a time when Radio 1 had made a point about being a modern station and wouldn't play the likes of Status Quo. Given Bonnie Tyler was around in the 70s one might think she wouldn't make the Radio 1 playlist but she did. The fact she had been around so long and hadn't had a hit for a decade is probably why this failed to make the UK Top 40. It's a cover of a song by Air Supply and was composed by Jim Steinman whose other main artist Meat Loaf was enjoying a chart revival in the UK around this time.

January Charts: 1980

Here are the new entries ranked from best to worst:

1. The Ramones - Baby I Love You

2. John Foxx - Underpass

3. The Specials - Too Much Too Young (The Special AKA Live! EP)

4. New Musik - Living By Numbers

5. Jefferson Starship - Jane

6. Azymuth - Jazz Carnival

7. The Bee Gees - Spirits (Having Flown)

8. Dexy's Midnight Runners - Dance Stance

9. Joe Jackson - It's Different For Girls

10. Jon And Vangelis - I Hear You Now

11. Styx - Babe

12. UFO - Young Blood

13. The Buggles - The Plastic Age

14. Sad Café - Strange Little Girl

15. Brass Construction - Music Makes You Feel Like Dancing

16. The Commodores - Wonderland

17. Kool And The Gang - Too Hot

18. Sister Sledge - Got To Love Somebody

19. Madness - My Girl

20. Amii Stewart - Paradise Bird / The Letter

21. The Shadows - Riders In The Sky

22. Rupert Holmes - Escape (The Pina Colada Song)

23. Dr Hook - Better Love Next Time

24. The Boomtown Rats - Someone's Looking At You

25. Captain Beaky - Captain Beaky/Wilfred The Weasel

26. Kenny Rogers - Coward Of The County

27. Matchbox - Buzz Buzz A Diddle It

28. Suzi Quatro - Mama's Boy

We're into a new decade though being January all of these records would of existed one way or another in the 70s.

It's topped by a rare 5 rating in "Baby I Love You" by The Ramones. It's a cover that beats the original, it's one of those punk bands experimenting with something different but keeping the punk elements and it works.

One of the main things you'd associate with the 80s is synth pop and it was already very much a thing at the beginning of the decade. In 2nd place we have "Underpass" by John Foxx, the former Ultravox singer making his Top 40 solo debut though Ultravox were yet to have a Top 40 hit at this point. It's a haunting record and again experimenting coming good.

There is also the debut for New Musik with "Living By Numbers". This was their Top 40 debut and the hit they are best known for. Also debuting are Jon & Vangelis with "I Hear You Now" though both had prior Top 40 hits separately, Jon as a member of Yes and Vangelis as a member of Aphrodite's Child. Then we have "The Plastic Age" from The Buggles, their follow up to their big hit "Video Killed The Radio Star" which doesn't suffer from being overplayed.

2 Tone was also big around the turn of the decade and one of the best records to come out of that scene in my opinion is "Too Much Too Young" by The Specials. We also have "My Girl" by Madness which finds itself nearer the bottom of the list but that's more to do with there being better records in there because I do like it.

We have quite an obscure Bee Gees record in "Spirits (Having Flown)" which was their final Top 40 hit before a lengthy hiatus from the charts. They'd already moved away from disco and this is one of their better efforts.

Jefferson Starship were essentially the link between Jefferson Airplane and Starship and this month they had their only UK Top 40 hit with "Jane". It's definitely worth a listen.

Down the bottom we have "Mama's Boy" by Suzi Quatro. Not the worst thing I've heard but does feel a bit like a hangover from the 70s with her glory days behind her.

There was a rockabilly revival going on around this time which I can't say I'm a fan of and that's why Matchbox are 2nd bottom with "Buzz Buzz A Diddle It". Likewise a lot of country music isn't for me which is why Kenny Rogers is just above with "Coward Of The County".

It's a great start to the decade, we have a 5 and no zeros which gives this a very respectable score.

Score: 59

2000: The Good Old Days? - January

January 2000 was something I'd been waiting for my whole life it seemed. I was one of many looking forward to the new millennium and had spoken about what I'd be doing to celebrate as early as the mid-90s. Once it was January 2000 the big question I had was what now?

From a music perspective one record that makes me think of the start of the 21st century in a positive way is "(Welcome) To The Dance" by Des Mitchell. To a lesser extent "In Your Arms (Rescue Me)" by Nu Generation also does but that's not as good as I remembered and therefore gets half marks.

The best record for this month is one I was definitely hearing on the Pete Tong show in the summer of 1999 which was "(Just) Me And You" by New Vision. That was possibly my favourite house record of that summer.

Dance music was the music of the moment around the turn of the century and at a stretch you could define around half the new entries as dance records, though there were only 25 new entries in total.

None of the dance records get zero points, most get full marks and some get half marks. Other dance records that deserve a mention include "Rainbow Country" by Bob Marley & Funkstar Deluxe, the lesser know follow up to "Sun Is Shining". There's  also Eddie Amador with his follow up to 1998s "House Music" with "Rise". Then there's "Because Of You" by Scanty Sandwich which is strange but good.

Outside of dance music we have full marks for Nas with "Nastradamus" and Donnell Jones with "U Know What's Up". There's also half marks for Sting & Cheb Mami with "Desert Rose", a rare Sting solo record I remember liking at the time but all these years later it's not as good as I remembered.

The worst record is an R&B record which is "Hot Boyz" by Missy Elliott. To be fair it's not as bad as our usual worst records but there was a small list of zero scoring records to choose from.

Here's a list of the records with the best on top, worst at the bottom and the good ones in green, OK ones in amber and rubbish ones in red (and in no particular order):

Score: 50%

Here's a look at the chart:

Well there we have it, the best month for chart music in the 21st century is January 2000. The story of the 21st century then is that it started well, took a dive in 2002 and then went into gradual decline from 2005 to 2007 with the odd decent month along the way. We're now only a couple of months away from completing the Top 30 reviews of the 90s so what we can do next is see how this ties back to the 90s as a whole.

UK Number 40s: Mumford & Sons - Guiding Light (2018)

 

Ask a casual music fan whether they've heard of Mumford & Sons and they'll probably say yes. Ask then if they could name a Mumford & Sons song and they'll probably say no.

They were they are talked about by the likes of the BBC you'd think they're one of the biggest bands of the modern era and maybe they are. Look at their Top 40 career and they don't look so big.

To their credit their Top 40 career has spanned 9 years, but in that time they managed just 5 Top 40 hits and never got higher than 12. This was the last of these 5 hits at the time of writing. More singles have been released but failed to reach the Top 40. 

Their 4 albums on the other hand have given them a pair of number 1s and a pair of number 2s. They'd not had an album since 2018 though.

UK Number 40s: Lily James ft Jessica Keenan Wynn & Alexa Davies & Celia Imrie - When I Kissed the Teacher (2018)

 

If at a music quiz you were to ask the question "Who had a Top 40 hit with When I Kissed The Teacher?" the answer you're most likely to get is Abba. That answer would be wrong because the Abba song was never a Top 40 hit.

That said, one may struggle to remember exactly who was on this record. All four are actresses who appeared in the film "Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again" off which this was taken.

None of these actresses has troubled the Top 40 again at the time of writing.

Top 30 in 1999 Reviewed: Week 41

Here's my weekly look at the Top 30 from 26 years ago. The plan is for these posts to go out at 17:30 on a Sunday.

Here is the Top 40 in full.

I've decided against repetition from previous weeks moving forward so will only feature the records I'm reviewing for the first time. I also won't repeat the reviews from the Top 20 in 1999 Reviewed posts.

Once again my opinions are inevitably going to differ from other people, but I'm not trying to convince anyone something is good or rubbish, I'm simply giving my opinion.

So this is the records new to the top 30 from this week in 1999 with my verdict on each record:

29. Point Break - Do We Rock

Point Break are yet another long forgotten boy band. It's members included Brett Adams and David Oliver who had both previously been in Byker Grove but a few years had passed since. This was their Top 40 debut, it's awful.

Verdict - Rubbish

25. The Space Brothers - Heaven Will Come

This was the fourth and final original Top 40 hit to date for The Space Brothers. It's a vocal trance record and there seems to be more of a focus on the vocals than the music itself. That's not a good thing in my opinion, but it's not bad.

Verdict - OK

24. Gary Barlow - For All That You Want

This is where the solo of Gary Barlow career initially came to an end. He had called upon the services of Swedish songwriters Max Martin and Kristian Lundin to make this record, but that couldn't stop this record from flopping. 

Verdict - Rubbish

21. Longpigs - Blue Skies

The Britpop era was over but nobody told the Longpigs who were back in the Top 40 for one final hit. It's chart position was more or less reflective of their Top 40 career overall but the band split shortly after this. I guess they're going a bit American on this record, still crap though.

Verdict - Rubbish

If we give the records which were good 1 point each and those which were OK half a point, the final score is 10/30, or 33%. Slight improvement on last week.

Dutch Top 40 1995: Week 41

These were the new entries in the Dutch Top 40 that never made the UK Top 40:

DJ Bobo - Freedom

DJ Bobo didn't have a Top 40 hit in the UK until 2003. In Holland this record marked the end of his Dutch Top 40 career. It's a Eurodance record with DJ Bobo rapping the verses and female singers Natascha Wright and Lisa Noya singing the chorus. It's clearly the same person who did "Love Is All Around", it follows that tried and tested formula.

Club X - The Sequel (La La La)

Being a gabber record in the Dutch Top 40 one would assume this is Dutch but it's not, it's Belgian. The sample used in this is the "La La La" bit of "Self Esteem" by The Offspring. It's quite possibly the familiarity of that sample that helped this record into the Dutch Top 40.

Snap ft Summer - The World In My Hands

In terms of original hits Snap were finished in the UK Top 40 by this point. In a way it was a shame because they'd started to make records I actually liked, partly because they'd sped up. In Holland they carried on and I guess this is what could have come next in the UK. This time they've slowed down, but it's not a bad record.

The Offspring - Come Out And Play (Keep Em Separated)

I'm surprised this was never a Top 40 hit in the UK because I remember it very well at the time and it seemed to be pretty well known. It only managed to get to 98 though. Maybe by the time it was released as a single people were fed up of hearing it on MTV all the time.

January Charts: 1979

Here are the new entries ranked from best to worst:

1. The Three Degrees - Woman In Love

2. Judas Priest - Take On The World

3. Blondie - Heart Of Glass

4. Electric Light Orchestra - Can't Get It Out Of My Head

5. Third World - Cool Meditation

6. Generation X - King Rocker

7. Doll - Desire Me

8. Dr Feelgood - Milk And Alcohol

9. UFO - Doctor Doctor

10. Nazareth - May The Sunshine

11. Edwin Starr - Contact

12. Olympic Runners - Sir Dancealot

13. Chanson - Don't Hold Back

14. Phoebe Snow - Every Night

15. Cerrone - Je Suis Music

16. London Symphony Orchestra - Theme From 'Superman'

17. Andy Gibb - (Our Love) Don't Throw It All Away

18. Peaches And Herb - Shake Your Groove Thing

19. Dan Hartman - This Is It

20. Leif Garrett - I Was Made For Dancin'

For many years the only song I knew by The Three Degrees was "When Will I See You Again" which I've always hated. I was therefore surprised how much I liked "Woman In Love" when I first heard it, given who it's by, it's a slower number and it's a cover of a song originally by Twiggy who wasn't really a singer.

In 2nd place we have the debut of heavy metal band Judas Priest with "Take On the World". They'd been going a few years but we were now entering the "New wave of British heavy metal" era of which Judas Priest we a big part of.

On paper the 3rd placed record should be rubbish because it's a non-disco group making a disco record but there's no denying "Heart of Glass" by Blondie is a great record. It's ahead of "Can't Get It Out Of My Head" by ELO which is decent but far from my favourite record of theirs.

I finally get to include an authentic punk record with "King Rocker" by Generation X which is decent. It's ahead of new wave one hit wonders Doll with "Desire Me" which in turn is ahead of "Milk & Alcohol" which was the biggest hit for pub rockers Dr Feelgood.

Most of the bottom half is disco records which is indicative of where disco was at by this point. Down the bottom is Leif Garrett with "I Was Made For Dancing". He was a teen idol who went off the rails, the usual story.

Whilst I would put the Leif Garrett record and "This Is It" by Dan Hartman and "Shake Your Groove Thing" by Peaches & Herb in the cheesy disco pop category what I would say are these are far from the worst disco records I've heard and the remaining disco records seem more credible.

The problem is that it seems to have become a bit formulaic by this point, something that does happen when you get too much of the same thing.

Overall we don't have the bad records keeping the score down, it's more the average records stopping the score from getting too high.

Score: 50

Now we've reached the end of the 70s let's take a look at the leaderboard:

Interesting how 1970 is so high up and 1971 is in the bottom half. It's almost like a sharp declined at some point in 1970 except 1973 finds itself sat in 3rd place. 

Perhaps no surprise to see 1976 2nd from bottom with 1975 not far above. Goes with the general theory that the 70s started and ended good but weren't so good in the middle.

2000: The Good Old Days? - February

In this era a record would typically get a few weeks of play on the radio and music channels before hitting the charts. Some records would get an earlier release date overseas and some were from already released albums. On that basis its safe to assume that most, if not all new entries this month were made in the 20th century.

The best record this month is "Playground Love" which was definitely made in the 20th century because it was from the 1999 film "The Virgin Suicides". I watched the film on the strength of this record, that's how much I like it.

As mentioned in March, there were no UK garage new entries in February. However a significant chunk of records this month come from what UK garage replaced as the dance genre of the moment, trance.

Sash! tended to make trance of a more commercial Eurodance variety, but this month we had "Adelante" which was more of a credible trance record which gets full marks. Armin Van Buuren made his Top 40 debut with "Communication" and this was an era when he was good.

A strong contender this month for the best record was "Must Be The Music" by Joey Negro & Taka Boom. This was a record I remember from the summer of 1999, it also sounds more of a summer record but just didn't chart until the winter. Ten City singer Byron Stingily had a solo version of the Ten City record "That's The Way Love Is" which was never going to beat the original but it's still a decent record.

Most of the dance records this month score points but we're also getting points from a wide range of genres. Rap wise we have "Simon Says" by Pharoahe Monch and R&B  wise we have "Got To Get It" by Sisqo. 

We generally expect rap and R&B to give us points but we also have records such as "Glorious" by Andreas Johnson and "The Great Beyond" by REM from the indie and alternative rock world giving us points. There's the funk rock of "Otherside" by Red Hot Chili Peppers and the pop record "Pure Shores" by All Saints giving us points.

However the worst record is also a pop record. It's "Ooh Stick You!" by Daphne & Celeste. I know it's supposed to be crap, but it's annoying enough to get that crown.

Here's a list of the records with the best on top, worst at the bottom and the good ones in green, OK ones in amber and rubbish ones in red (and in no particular order):

Score: 46%

Here's a look at the chart:

I would be quite fitting for the 2nd month of the 21st century to be the best month of the 21st century. It would be even more fitting if it was the first. We'll find out next.

UK Number 40s: Camila Cabello - She Loves Control (2018)

 

Normally when someone attempts a solo career after leaving a girl group, they are often overshadowed by their time in a girl group even if their solo career is successful. An exception to that rule is Camila Cabello, I couldn't remember what girl group she'd previously been in and had to look it up. It was Fifth Harmony.

At the time of writing she's had 15 Top 40 hits, more than I was expecting. A lot more than the 5 she had with Fifth Harmony, again I didn't realise they had that many.

This was Top 40 hit number 6 and she topped the charts with her 4th hit "Havana" and 8th hit "Senorita". I sense a theme here, so maybe she'd have been more successful if it had a more Latin sounding name.

20 Years Since....Q3 2005

Here's the tunes I was enjoying 20 years ago:

2Pac ft Elton John - Ghetto Gospel

When 2Pac died in 1996 he only had 2 Top 40 hits to his name. The was Top 40 hit number 17 for him and saw him finally top the charts. It was Top 40 hit number 67 for Elton John though he didn't have an awful lot to do with it as his appearance came via a sample.

Dancing DJs vs Roxette - Fading Like A Flower

Like Elton John on "Ghetto Gospel" Roxette didn't have an awful lot to do with this record other than get sampled. The difference is that they've sampled pretty much the entire record. 

99% of the time records like this are dreadful but this is part of the 1% that's great to listen to.

Goldfrapp - Ooh La La

Goldfrapp had been around a few years at this point and were popular but it was this record that really took them into the big time. To me this was something new and different and gave me optimism for the future of music.

Frankie J - Obsession (No Es Amor)

This record threw me at the time. It had only been a few months since 3rd Wish had done the same song and that too had featured Baby Bash on it like this one does.

The question was which one came first? Turns out it was neither, they were both covers.

Transplants - Gangstas & Thugs

By this point we knew the sort of formula to expect from a Transplants record, a sort of punk meets drum & bass with a bit of rapping thrown in. It's a formula that worked and the band more or less existed because of it.

UK Number 40s: Cardi B ft 21 Savage - Bartier Cardi (2018)

 

Both artists on this record have had both a number 1 and a number 40 but in a different order. It was the 3rd Top 40 hit for Cardi B who managed to top the charts with Top 40 hit number 12 with "WAP". It was the 2nd Top 40 hit for 21 Savage who topped the charts with his debut "Rockstar".

Both are rappers and this record came in a year when rap became more prolific in the Top 40 than any other genre had in the past. 

Top 30 in 1999 Reviewed: Week 40

Here's my weekly look at the Top 30 from 26 years ago. The plan is for these posts to go out at 17:30 on a Sunday.

Here is the Top 40 in full.

I've decided against repetition from previous weeks moving forward so will only feature the records I'm reviewing for the first time. I also won't repeat the reviews from the Top 20 in 1999 Reviewed posts.

Once again my opinions are inevitably going to differ from other people, but I'm not trying to convince anyone something is good or rubbish, I'm simply giving my opinion.

So this is the records new to the top 30 from this week in 1999 with my verdict on each record:

24. Idlewild - Little Discourage

This was the 2nd Top 40 hit for Scottish indie band Idlewild and the lead single from their 2nd album. I only really remember them existing and making music that was pretty boring and forgettable. Listening to this record tells me my memory serves me correctly.

Verdict - Rubbish

If we give the records which were good 1 point each and those which were OK half a point, the final score is 8.5/30, or 28%. We really are up and down.

Dutch Top 40 1995: Week 40

These were the new entries in the Dutch Top 40 that never made the UK Top 40:

Double Vision - Knockin

In the UK in the 90s we had Eurodance acts from several European countries hit the Top 40. One notable absent country though was Spain. In Holland we had Spanish Eurodance act Double Vision top the charts with this record. The music is very much Eurodance but the vocals sound quite gothic, a strange combination. Their Dutch Top 40 career began and ended in 1995 but we have one more record of theirs to come.

Arno Kolenbrander - Why God Why

Between 1985 and 2002 Holland had a TV show called "Soundmixshow" which was essentially their version of "Stars in Their Eyes", though they came up with the idea first. Arno Kolenbrander was the 1995 winner of the show and this was his winning song. It's a cover of a song from the musical "Miss Saigon" and the song title more or less sums up what I think of it.

Clouseau - Zie Me Graag

For the 3rd and final time this year we have a hit from Belgian band Clouseau with a song sang in Dutch. I'm listening to the song waiting for it to start and finding something to say about it, but it never happens, just plain dull.

Vaya Con Dios - Don't Break My Heart

Another Belgian band but this time one singing in English. They topped the Dutch Top 40 with their debut "What's A Woman" in 1990 but in 1991 founding member Dirk Schoufs died. The band carried on but this would be near the end for them. In 1996 singer Dani Klein quit the music business. That was until she came back and eventually reformed the band who are still going at the time of writing.

2000: The Good Old Days? - March

This isn't a month of halves, every record either gets a 1 or 0. That might explain why I was quite surprised by the score once I added it up at the end.

The best record this month is "Is It Love?" by Chili Hi Fly. I'm pretty certain I first heard this in the summer of 1999 so it just took a while to get to the charts. It's one of those summer house records you may associate with Ibiza.

Artful Dodger returned to the charts with their 2nd Top 40 hit "Movin Too Fast". This was surprisingly the first UK garage record to make the Top 40 in 2000, over 2 months after the year began. This one gets full marks but the other garage record this month doesn't get any which is "Can't Get Used To Losing You" by Colour Girl.

Trance wise the only decent record is "Sunshine" by Yomanda. The others are ATB covering "Killer" which is in every way inferior to the Adamski version. Then there's "Don't Give Up" by Chicane & Bryan Adams. I like Chicane but this just doesn't work for me. It worked for him though because it topped the charts.

Most of the house records are decent. As well as the best record they include "Off the Wall" by Wisdome and "Mr Devil" by Big Time Charlie & Soozy Q. The only one I don't like is "Chocolate Sensation" by Lenny Fontana & DJ Shorty, yet another record sampling "Love Sensation" which was getting tired by this point.

Just the one decent rap record which is "Still Dre" by Dr Dre and Snoop Dogg. I was shocked when it was revealed it was written Jay-Z who is one of my least favourite rappers. Big rivals to Jay-Z for that crown had Top 40 hits this month who were Puff Daddy and Will Smith.

Just the one decent R&B record too which comes from the Honeyz with "Won't Take It Lying Down". 

Blink 182 had their 2nd Top 40 hit with "All the Small Things" which is the one they're best known for. Whilst not as good as their pre-fame material it's a decent enough record.

Onto the worst record and that comes from Geri Halliwell with "Bag It Up". I remember the Top of the Pops performance with boxes of washing powder on stage labelled "Girl Powder" and thinking what a load of nonsense.

Here's a list of the records with the best on top, worst at the bottom and the good ones in green, OK ones in amber and rubbish ones in red (and in no particular order):

Score: 27%

Here's a look at the chart:

It felt a better month than the score suggests, but then again this would be a good score by later years standards.

January Charts: 1978

Here are the new entries ranked from best to worst:

1. Bill Withers - Lovely Day

2. Electric Light Orchestra - Mr Blue Sky

3. Rich Kids - Rich Kids

4. Rose Royce - Wishing On A Star

5. War - Galaxy

6. Scott Fitzgerald And Yvonne Keeley - If I Had Words

7. Tonight - Drummer Man

8. Eddie and the Hot Rods - Quit This Town

9. Modern Lovers - Morning Of Our Lives

10. People's Choice - Jam, Jam, Jam (All Night Long)

11. Heatwave - The Groove Line

12. T-Connection - On Fire

13. Gordon Giltrap - Heartsong

14. Paul Henry Featuring Mayson Glen Orchestra - Benny's Theme

15. The Sweet - Love Is Like Oxygen

16. Smokie - For A Few Dollars More

17. El Coco - Cocomotion

18. Stargard - Theme From 'Which Way Is Up'

19. Linda Ronstadt - Blue Bayou

20. Darts - Come Back My Love

21. David Bowie - Beauty And The Beast

22. Rod Stewart - Hot Legs/I Was Only Joking

23. Terry Wogan - The Floral Dance

24. Baccara - Sorry I'm A Lady

25. Brotherhood Of Man - Figaro

Punk was very much a thing in the charts by January 1978, it just seemed to be taking a winter break from them. There were no punk records as such but there were ones you would closely associate.

There's "Quit This Town" by Eddie & the Hot Rods that is technically pub rock but you could easily lump this together with punk. Then we have "Drummer Man" which was the only Top 40 hit for Tonight who were described as new wave. The best of these records though was "Rich Kids" by Rich Kids, another new wave band whose members included former Sex Pistol Glen Matlock and a man of many bands Midge Ure.

Pipping the Rich Kids into 2nd place though is ELO with "Mr Blue Sky" which came close to winning but what it came down to was the fact the outro on this is a bit too long. This meant that Bill Withers comes 1st with "Lovely Day" which I even loved as a teenager predominantly listening to rave music.

The disco music here is mostly credible. The best of these is "The Groove Line" by Heatwave, helped by the fact Brandon Block did a house version in the 90s that I liked. From The Bahamas we have T-Connection with "On Fire" which is decent whilst "Cocomotion" by El Coco is alright. 

However we do have a cheesy one with Baccara having their lesser known 2nd and final hit with "Sorry I'm A Lady" but this is only the 2nd worst record. Down the bottom is Brotherhood Of Man with "Figaro" which is a reminder of the sort of cheesy rubbish we'd get in 1976.

Terry Wogan is in the charts with "The Floral Dance" which I remember very well from the Top of the Pops reruns. It's rubbish, but then it's clearly meant to be. We have another novelty record from Paul Henry with "Benny's Theme" but despite that fact I find the actual music really good.

David Bowie finds himself near the bottom with "Beauty And The Beast". I've just never got the appeal of his music even if many music fans don't agree. I am however sure that many music fans share my dislike of Rod Stewart and I didn't even bother listening to his double a-side "Hot Legs/I Was Only Joking" because I've heard it many times and don't like it.

I do like most of the records in this batch. The problem is that the ones I don't like are ones I really don't like and score zero.

Score: 45